If you get a Raya Puasa text from me,
and you tell me you don't celebrate Raya P,
you're wrong.

As a Muslim you don't celebrate Raya P,
But as a Malaysian it is your sworn duty,
to celebrate EVERY goddamn festival known to man.

Because if there is an open-house, you will make it!
Because if there is food you will eat it!
Because if there is angpao you will try to receive it!
Because if there is a gathering of nonsense to partake in, YOU WILL PARTAKE IN IT!

JUAN MELAYSHIA, YO!
(the most nonsense tag-line anyone ever barfed up on a Saturday morning hangover)
((because we Malaysians have been 1M'sia ever since we were born))
(((seriously, how stupid do they think we are?)))
((((oh, shit, some of these lines rhyme!))))