In Adequacy
Sarcophagus of silence,
Alone,
Pondering,
Sit staring into darkness the quiet weeps insignificant,
reverberations of adequacy,
Inadequacy,
Thoughts of imperfections,
Minuscule but triumphant.
A hole,
Deep,
Meaningless an abyss of disrepair,
Of self reflection.
Reflection?
Refraction of soul
Askew,
Deliberate,
Callous,
Distant.
Sharp intangible knives,
Stabbing a pain,
The fourth vertebrae.
Collapse,
The ego collapses,
No longer immune.
The sticks,
The stones.
They consume the corpse,
Falls into disregard,
Ignored.
Broken.
But never forever so she awakens.
____________________________
I'm rather pissed at myself for an idiot week. This feeling is awful. Someone cauterise it so that the bleeding stops and I can be genuinely happy.
I'm posting lots of crazy on my twitter right now, sounds like I have the crazies.
Questions off Na's blog from HERE I will answer.
1. Five ways to win my heart:
- Make me laugh
- Nerd/Geek out with as much fervour as I do
- Be nice to the waiter.
- RESPECT MY FAMILY as I respect yours, don't be a douche.
- Read me like a book
2. Something I feel strongly about:
- A sense of self. Who you are is not defined by your religious faith, your political views, or your skin colour. Who you are is defined by your thoughts, passion for the things you do, your interests, the people you surround yourself with and most importantly, your self respect.
3. A book I love:
- Will always be my first love, when I decided that this was the genre that would forever captivate me. Tom Holt's Odds and Gods. When you can do a piss-take and get people to laugh.
4. Bullet my whole day?
- If I had to bullet my whole day? >> Be occupado.
5. Things I want to say to my ex:
- Thank you. You have no idea how much whatever you did meant to me.
6. Views on mainstream music.
- I hate it. yes, HATE.
7. Five pet peeves:
- Tardiness
- overly emotional people
- parents who cannot control their children
- jealous types
- Not winning
8. What I ate today:
- A burger from Grill'd. I miss the nice 8 ringgit burger at Taman Permata.
9. How important I think education is:
- Finish college. You need college if only for the people you meet and the friends you make because they're the ones who secure your future. Not a piece of paper that says how good you were in your exams. Learn to accomodate.
10. 10 songs playing on shuffle:
- Soundgarden's Holy Water
- Soundgarden's Down On The Upside
- Arctic Monkeys' Secret Doors
- Greenday's Minority
- Epica's version of Stabat Mater Dolorosa (From Stabat Mater-Giovanni Battista Pergolesi)
- Amy Macdonald's This Is The Life
- Slipknot's Tattered and Torn
- Skindred's Tears
- Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive
- Chevelle's Peer
11. My family:
- is worthy of their own sitcom.
My father (Ayah Awesome), my hero, so inappropriate, foot-in-mouth-disease, speaks his mind, loving, cracks super lame dad-jokes/puns.
My mother (Enda Awesome), our balance, she frets for us when we don't for ourselves, she then moves on to fret for everyone else just because she can, itchy-butt cannot keep still, gave birth to me so hello? Imagine if that never happened?
My siblings, so different like a bunch of highschool stereotypes. I can't imagine life without them. It would be pretty quiet and uneventful.
12. Five guys I find attractive
- By simple physical features and not including personality types... my studio lect with chinhair, Luca with chinhair, Christian Bale with chinhair, Jason Momoa with chinhair, Gerard Butler because he's a man's man. I'm starting to see a common theme here... Chinhair. omigosh.
13. My opinion on my body and how comfy I am with it:
- I love my body but a few days a month it goes apeshit and I can't do anything about it. :(
14. What I wore today:
- Jeggings (I can't belive I used that word), black long sleeved shirt and a Ripcurl hoodie, flipflops.
15. My zodiac and if it fits my personality:
- Aries Fire Rabbit, Hell to the yes.
16. Something I always think 'What if...' about:
- What if i didn't have SMA 3? how different would I be?
17. Something that I'm proud of:
- At the moment, Tape Melbourne. In general, I live in another country.
18. A problem that I've had:
- I was a problem child. You figure that out yourself.
19. Five items I lust after:
- Ibanez Iceman
- Better computer
- Canary Yellow Cobra Mustang Convertible 2003 with Bose soundsystem and black leather interior.
- Amazing soundsystem
- My own apartment
20. My fears:
- Heights but I'll conquer that soon.
- Losing my family
21. How I hope my future will be like:
- Just like I imagine it would be because I'll make it happen.
22. My academics:
- Great enough to get me through to the next checkpoint.
23.Something that I miss:
- MY CAT :(
24. Five words or phrases that make me laugh:
- Ich bin Berliner (Which means I am a donut haha)
- NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
- Theo Van DOUCHEBAG
- Meow
- What? Huh? What? What?...
25. Something I'm currently worrying about
- Uni work. I feel horrid about it and I feel like I need a slap in the face. Meh.
26. Things I like and dislike about myself:
Like - I'm awesome
Dislike - I procrastinate
27. A quote I try to live by:
- "Anything you can do I can do better..." Annie Get your Gun.
28. Somewhere I'd like to move to or visit:
- EVERYWHERE
29. Five weird things that I like:
- Manly Chinhair on my men and I don't care that it scrapes my face.
- Sour things
- Heavy Metal
- Angry Stand-up Comedy
- Old Musicals
30. One thing I'm excited for:
- I'm always looking forward and am excited for the life I am working towards.
